“I think it’s okay to use cute if you’re writing about vomit and diarrhea. Because it’s not what people would ever expect. (ie. I just vomited all over my husband. Doesn’t he look cute?) But you can’t call cute things cute, because… well, I don’t know.”
That’s right, Alisa. And what you ‘didn’t know’, or more aptly, what you couldn’t put into words at that moment (because you are a brilliant wordsmith), is that you can’t call cute things cute because it’s kind of boring, overdone, obvious and a little cruel. I mean, as if we need reminding. So, I’m calling you out (not you, Alisa, but you, the reader of this post) and requesting that you get more creative.
I’m short, rather small, and for some reason this makes people want to call me ‘cute’. Maybe I am (though that has to be subjective) – but that’s exactly why it’s not okay to call me that. Sometimes people even call my writing ‘cute’. I can’t explain to you why these incidents disturb me, but they do. Oh yes, it’s because I’m not a bunny. Or a puppy. Neither is my writing. It isn’t even short.
Some other words that need to be banished: ‘nice’ and ‘fine’. ‘Pretty’ sucks, too. These words have no verve, man. No chutzpah.
I’m not into burning books, so I can’t really condone the burning of words, either…but maybe we could just throw these in the closet? They’ve overstayed their welcome and have become quite useless. It is my contention that they’ve become offensive and insulting. Annoyed with someone? Call ’em cute. It really is the new [email protected]#k you.
Would you like to add any words to the pile before I seal the closet door shut?
(And, yes, I blatantly avoided overtly swear on this here blog, using ‘@#’ for ‘uc’ because my dad reads my posts every day – apparently he reads old posts on days I don’t publish – and it would’ve really pissed him off. He might even have called me the ‘c’ word had I gone for it…)
Image credit: Treyevan