My dreams have always been rather extravagant. They’re long, rolling affairs that flow like a 5,000 page novel strewn with unlikely, but extraordinarily real, appearances from people in both my past and my present. My dreams are filled with emotion, and I wake up feeling like they actually happened with the residue of the experience sticking to me…sometimes for the rest of that day. Sometimes, it’s hard to shake.
I’ve had three recurring dream themes for as long as I can remember about:
- Swimming (in pools mostly)
- Airplanes (because I’m terrified to fly)
- Not being able to see (like when you come inside after being in the blinding sun)
I don’t have those classic and cliche dreams about showing up to school naked or sitting down to a test and not knowing the answers; I don’t have dreams that speak directly to my current goings on or reflect literal and immediate anxieties…I just never have.
But last night, I had a marathon dream in which every thing that could go wrong with my voting activities went wrong.
- I stood in my line to vote, Barack was at the table receiving ballots, and after waiting for a really long time and getting right up to the front, I realized that I had never checked in and didn’t have my ballot.
- Then, I went to get the ballot and didn’t have the money to pay for it. (yes, I know it’s free to vote – this was a dream)
- Somehow, I got back in line and when I got to the front, Barack was talking about his grandmother who just passed, ‘Toot’, and I hugged him and cried with him, but still had no way to actually vote.
- I finally got my ballot and went back to get in line but now it was miles long.
- I waited and waited…and several other nutty things happened.
- Then, just as I got to the head of the line, Barack and his children had their lunch break, they turned around to the other side of their table, and we were told to go find another line.
Over and over again, I’d find myself in line, at the voting building, only to realize that I still hadn’t managed to vote.
Oy. It seems that this election has done a serious number on my psyche…my subconscious is feeling it.
I live in a tiny town on a tiny island. I will vote today…I know that…so maybe my anxiety was as indirect as usual…maybe it was for all of you (who I can’t control and are likely to face interminably long lines and broken voting systems).
So, do me a favor…vote (early, often and for Obama) and let me know when you did…it’ll put my mind at ease.
Update: I voted. I cried when we got to the polls, when I saw someone holding an Obama sign outside – I was so overwhelmed with how amazing all of this has been. It took exactly 12 minutes from start to finish, beginning of the line to out the door. I stared at the Obama/Biden line and the oval that I had filled in – I wanted to remember what it looked like after I left. I wanted to make sure I had done it right.