Weeding out the closet

September 28th, 2009

Late every August, just before school started, my mom would take me to the department store (Famous Barr, if you happen to be from St. Louis) to get my Back to School clothes. And I would pick the clothes that I thought I should wear. For some reason and year after year, I chose a wardrobe that really stretched so far away from who I was, that the fabric should have burst into flames ripped.

They looked like this picture. They were ‘outfits’ to the nth degree. They matched. They were ’sets’. There was no flexibility, no room to move. I would try to wear these new clothes to school…and I would feel nothing but uncomfortable all day. Worse than that, though: I wouldn’t feel like me.

Before long, I was back in jeans, a t-shirt and sneakers. And in these clothes, my clothes, I could relax, soften, feel the appropriate contours of my body. I could breathe, laugh, have room to grow the way I was intended to.

I understood on a deep level that I didn’t like the feeling of the prescribed clothes. And, as I got older, the ‘wrong’ clothes took up less and less space in my closet and the days that I didn’t feel ‘right’ got fewer and farther in between.

By my senior year, I’m proud to say, I did not have one uncomfortable day. It was purposeful, absolutely.

I feel like my writing is following this path. Fiction is the corduroy skirt from Esprit; writing for SEO is the loudly colored, cardigan with the random pockets from Benetton…I’m weeding them out. And they’re headed to the Goodwill.

Actually, I feel like my life is following this path.

Can you get rid of anything that doesn’t feel like you? Do it. And replace it with what feels good. Pick what fits.

This post is dedicated to the amazing women that attended the Type-A Mom Conference with me this weekend. Their energy and company inspired this post during my panel about writing with authenticity.

{And if you need music to go along with this post, I highly recommend this. Turned all the way UP.}