Tripping us up: mistakes that knock us around, but not down.
Not so smart
You know how I love to rollerblade, right? Possibly more than running. I’m wondering if there’s a rollerblading marathon, because while I’m up to easily running 8 miles, I can’t imagine making it through 26.2. I can, however, see myself doing it on my blades, no problem.
But there’s this ‘thing’ that happens to me most every morning that I skate. And I’m just fascinated by what it all means. I’ll be skating along thinking about stuff, when I’ll ‘trip’. I don’t fall, I catch myself, but it scares the shit out of me. No big deal, right? It’s bound to happen, what with all the sticks and stones scattered in my path. But, I’m convinced that it’s karmic…or something.
Because I usually trip after having a particular sort of thought. Like a disparaging one about myself or a ‘not nice’ one about someone else. Or about an idea that might not serve me very well. Or one that I’m not paying nearly enough attention to.
You see, it feels like ‘something else’ is making me trip. Some force greater than me. Is it my fairy godmother? The guy with the falcon? My conscience? Or would that be my subconscious?
All I know is that it’s so deliberate (not to mention sequential and orderly, ie. thought —> trip), that I’ve now taken to exclaiming, ‘Okay! I got it! For god’s sake!’ after it happens.
Before the fall
I used to rollerblade with only a helmet and wrist/hand guards for protection. My reasoning was that I only need my head and my hands to write (which equals work). And while breaking a leg or shattering a knee cap would be damn inconvenient, it wouldn’t actually destroy me.
And so
One freezing cold morning a few days after this past Christmas, just before dawn – I got a nice big dose of, ‘maybe that wasn’t the best reasoning’. In other words, I fell. Hard.
And it hurt…and my left knee was in bad shape. And while my head and hands still worked, I couldn’t run or rollerblade or bike for a bit, I could hardly walk. And I don’t really do so well when I can’t start my day off with a good sweat.
Much smarter
I immediately learned my lesson. The right knee got all gussied up in a knee-pad the very next time I got on my blades. And I concentrated on my plan of throwing myself in that direction if I fell again – until my left knee had healed enough for me to put its knee-pad on. (It took a good month and luckily I didn’t fall in the interim.)
But still…
I make work mistakes. I’ve underbid, I publish and then find typos, I’ve forgotten to change names in contracts. These things happen to the best of us (particularly when we’re moving very, very fast and multi-tasking on steroids, cough, cough). And they bug me. A lot.
I also make life mistakes. I’ve hurt people that I love. I’ve let fear win. I’ve made bad choices. I’ve ignored my heart and disregarded my gut. These things also happen to the best of us. And they also bug me. A lot.
Feeling it everywhere
This morning, I was on my rollerblades, zooming along, perfectly happy…when all of a sudden I remembered, out of the blue, a mistake I made a couple of months ago. Instantly, I’m filled with self-revulsion and what I can only imagine is shame. I start whipping myself as I relive the gaff in my mind and body. It’s a very physical experience, akin to ice water filled with tiny needles running through my body, my chest in particular for some reason.
And then, like clockwork, my left skate hits something (allegedly) and I flail for a few moments. Enough to get me to pay attention. To the fact that, ‘IT’S OVER’ and time to move on. To the fact that if I had fallen, I’d be okay because I’m now fully padded. To the fact that the fact that I’m fully padded means I’m capable of learning my lessons and NOT repeating them. To the fact that it’s time to move ON. To the fact that something wonderful’s taking care of me – that falcon dude, or some goddess…
Or more likely, it’s just me. Laden with forgiveness and determined to walk right to that edge, but never fall all the way down.
Image credit: NikoKunze
Filed under How To, Myth or Reality | Tags: business, business owner, copywriter, copywriting, getting back up, life lessons, making mistakes, writer, Writing | Comments (15)Right-sized
I don’t want to let you all down, but I have to tell you that I have a flaw – (yes! just one) which, to be perfectly honest, I could spin into a talent were I pressed to do so.
You see, I have a knack for making things bigger than they are.
How is this a talent?
Well, it’s a sure sign of creativity and a vivid imagination, both of which you’d want to see in a writer, yes? And, by making minor things major, I can easily distract myself from really critical things that would suck to think about. (See how that works? It’s kind of like reverse psychology or Massive Distraction Disorder…or something).
How is this a problem?
Oh, dear…let me count the ways. Primarily? It’s about self-induced stress and causing mountains of unnecessary, waste of time pain. Here’s how it works – your friend Sue tells you that her dog has Kennel Cough. And YOU:
- Wrack your brain to remember the last time your dog was at the kennel.
- Remember it was only 3 weeks ago.
- Try to recall whether or not the dog has been coughing.
- Assume he is, right now, hacking up a lung.
- Shiver and shake at the memory of how much it costs every time you take the damn dog to the vet.
- Realize it’s the end of the month and all of the bills are due.
- Start panicking about money.
- Worry that if you lose a client this week, you won’t be able to pay your bills.
- Find that Huffington Post article about the average number of middle class families that can’t pay their mortgage.
- Groan at the thought of having to relocate to Topeka to live with your parents because you lost the house.
- Pop a Xanax.
- Pop another for good measure.
Oh, yes, I could keep going.
A dog, not even your own, has a cough. A cough!!! And now, you’re having a full-blown panic attack about living with your mother in Kansas!
Why?
Because you haven’t kept it right-sized – you made it wrong-sized, super-sized. Step away from the story and walk back up that 12 step ladder we just slithered down (into hell). Go back to the first moment. A dog has a cough? Oh, maybe you should call the vet and make sure your dog’s kennel cough shots are up to date. Great idea! Now finish your lunch, enjoy it and then move on to the next thing. In other words, stop and look around at reality.
If someone told you that you could reduce your stress by, let’s say 75%, wouldn’t you jump at the chance? Me too. So when a situation presents itself – say there’s a lot of traffic on the way home – I’m doing my best not to write a rapid-fire story that leaves me with a terminal disease. I just call the family, say, ‘Hey, I might be a little late’, put on some good tunes and dance my way home. Perfectly sized.
If you think you need a little help ‘sizing’ your life, I highly recommend you call the best life coach in the universe.
Image credit: Editor B
Sit on it.
This morning, my children (Sophie 3, Jack 2) were sitting together on the floor, looking at photo albums and having a grand old time – when Sophie decided she’d had enough. She’s entered this sassy, bossy stage of late – and so, in rare form as usual, she jumped to her feet, hands full on her hips, and started barking directives at Jack:
Jackie! Pick that up. Jackie! Go find my horse! Jackie! Stop that right now!
She kept it up for a few minutes, rattling off orders – one after the next – while he ignored her and kept looking at his book.
Until he couldn’t take it any longer.
He looked up at her – and there was silence as they locked eyes for a nice, long moment.
Then, he stood up, knocked her over and sat on her.
What do you do with that nagging voice inside your head?
Filed under How To, The Business | Tags: copywriter, copywriting, Julie Roads, life lessons, marketing writer, Writing Roads | Comments (10)
